How can I protect my LGTB son in college?
Thursday, June 11th, 2009*In honor of “LGTB Pride Month”, Babs will answer questions on the LGTB college search.
Dear Babs,
My son is starting college in the fall, and I’m worried for his safety. My son is gay, and I’m concerned that there will be homophobia on campus. I’ve heard about gay-bashing and hazing, and I’m worried that he will have a hard time making friends or worse-be assaulted. He said he wants to join an LGTB rights group on campus, but I’m worried that will just invite others to single him out. Is there anything I can do to protect him?
-Protecting Papa
Dear Protecting Papa,
Of course you want to protect your son. Sending your kids off to college for the first time is stressful enough without having to worry about bigotry. However, you shouldn’t be concerned about a campus LGTB rights organization. By joining an LGTB club, he won’t be singling himself out for harassment-he’ll be protecting himself with a group of peers.
Strength is often found in numbers. By joining an LGTB rights group, your son will meet people who know what it’s like to have to deal with other people’s prejudice. He will find support and friendship. Prejudice is never brave-bullies are less likely to pick on someone with a strong support network. Joining an LGTB rights organization is actually possibly the best thing your son can do to protect himself.
One thing you can do is contact the school to see what kind of institutional support the campus offers. Make sure they include the words gay, lesbian, or transgendered in their anti-discrimination policy. See if they offer any LGTB leadership organizations so that your son can learn how to stand up for his rights on campus, even in the face of harassment.
Although there is bigotry, hatred, and violence on college campuses, there is also a wealth of support. Many schools now protect the rights of their LGTB students, rather than ignore them. College is the time that your son should be making friends, learning, and discovering who he is as an adult. You will never be able to shelter your son from all the hatred in the world, but you can show him that he doesn’t need to hide who he is and that he can stand up for his rights.
Good Luck!
-Babs
