Operation: Dorm Storm
Tuesday, February 3rd, 2009Don’t try this at home – We’re Brofessionals
Mission #3 – Fridge Fiasco
We’d ask all day, every day, but our buddies just wouldn’t crack about the location of our doors. “C’mon bro, it smells like Pepe Le Pew had an orgy in my room on a bed made out of Limburger cheese,” we’d say. Without any sense of remorse whatsoever, our rivals answered “Better get some Febreze, bro.”
They never cracked a smiled, they never laughed, and they never blinked. It was quite clear that the only way to get our doors back would be to take something of theirs that was equally as precious. We contemplated taking their doors, but it had been done. We thought about stealing their mattresses, but it wasn’t sinister enough. We even considered rigging their dorm with firecrackers, but it was illegal. So, we settled on something that would get their blood boiling but keep us out of serious trouble at the same time.
We waited through the weekend until Monday morning, when our enemies had an 8:00 am class together. As soon as we heard the door close behind them, we jumped into action. Using a familiar tactic, we slid a book cover between the door and the lock; and after just three attempts, we were in.
We immediately went straight for the refrigerator. After unplugging it and placing it on a dolly, we headed straight for the basement and that random storage room. Although normally it would raise some suspicion to see a couple kids wheeling a fridge around the dorm, it was simply too early to get caught. After reaching the storage space, I slid my library card into the small area between the door and the frame; slowly, the door squeaked open.
It looked as though the room hadn’t been used in years, which was really good for us. Quickly, we found an outlet and plugged the fridge back in – after all, we didn’t want Grammy’s homemade sausages going rank on us, smelling up the room and exposing our evil plot. Then, we nestled the fridge into a corner, covered it with a blanket and were out of there faster than you can say, “Where the *%$@ is our fridge!?!?”
And when they got home and saw a gaping hole where the fridge used to be, that’s exactly what they asked. They begged and pleaded and even threw this one out there: “Tell me where the refrigerator is, it’s going to stink up the whole building.”
I smiled back at him and said, “Better get some Febreze, bro.”
